Tantrums revisited

"I have to love my children with a mature commitment that reaches past my feelings for them, which can change from circumstance to circumstance." -Sally Clarkson, Mission of Motherhood

I am STILL reading this book a few pages at a time whenever I get a chance. I read this quote like 10 times because it is exactly what I needed to hear right now. As I mentioned before, Liam has been frustrating me in so many ways. His sleep schedule is messed up which makes him grumpy, clingy, whiny, and constantly on the verge of a screaming meltdown. I love him more than anything. Anyone who reads my blog would know that. But, lately, he hasn't exactly been a pleasant person that people want to be around. Except for extended family who he always seems to muster up the energy for. Some days are good but some days he wakes up in a bad mood and it is downhill from there. Anyway, I have been having a hard time coping with the feelings I have for him. One day I swear he is the best thing that has ever stepped foot on our planet and the next day I wonder what planet he came from and when will he be returning. At the end of the day, I can't wait to put him to bed just so I can get a break from him. The reason I like this quote is because it defines unconditional love for me. It's not about the feelings I have when I'm with him but it's about the commitment I have to loving and accepting him even at his worst.

The other quote I have found helpful is, "Other times when our children misbehave by throwing tantrums and crying out of control, it is because we have exhausted them. Children need regular food, sleep and a familiar environment in which they can relax, explore, and refresh themselves. Too much time in an unfamiliar or over stimulating environment can frazzle a child's nerves, and often the only way he has to show his physical and emotional frustration is to cry. Instead of discipline, what he may really need is a nap or some cheese and crackers or a quiet time on mom's lap."

This is so Liam. The problem we are encountering is that he mostly needs sleep (which I am unable to force) and time on my lap (which is usually designated to the nursing baby). It is still reassuring that it's all a product of being an immature young child and not the product of being a brat or being absolutely insane, no matter what it looks like in the middle of a tantrum.